How to End a Song (or Not): Slam Cores, Crust Punks & Bendy Phones
What do Björk, crust punks, and shattered phone screens have in common? Not a lot, unless you're listening to this week’s Beat Motel episode, where Andrew is rejoined by Sam for a gloriously unhinged chat on how songs end... or don’t.
We spend a solid half hour rambling before even mentioning the episode’s topic. But who needs structure when you’ve got riffs of the week ranging from crunchy sludge to grindcore bands sampling podcast clips (shoutout Hello Kitty Funland), a philosophical debate on crust punk fashion, and the inevitable descent into chat about Lord of the Rings accents, bending phones, and old dudes getting emotional about The Charlatans?
We do eventually talk endings—codas, fade-outs, orgasmic musical climaxes (sorry mum), and tracks that just yeet themselves into oblivion like Sabbath’s "War Pigs." You’ll hear tracks that end with a question mark, songs that smash themselves to bits with piano noise, and at least one that leaves you wondering if the studio engineer fell asleep on the desk.
In this episode:
Why Björk is the queen of the chaos outro
What Led Zeppelin got right with “Achilles’ Last Stand”
A crash course in Blackened Crust™
Whether anyone actually needs a folding phone
Why crust punks are just vegans with patches and trauma
How The Clash nailed the fade-out (and birth control lyrics)
Oh, and we manage to wind up fans of Pantera and Dave Mustaine in one go. You’re welcome.
### Riffs of the week
#### Dr Sam's Riff
- Slither - Master of Suspense (2.26)
#### Andrew's Riff
- Hello Kitty Fun land preview
### Dr Sam's track choices
1. Bjork - Crystalline (4.00)
2. ZU - Ostia (4.25)
3. Descendents - Clean Sheets (2.43)
4. The Clash - Rudie Can't Fail (2.46)
### Andrew's track choices
1. Led Zeppelin - Achilles Last Stand (9:20)
2. Television - Prove It (4:30)
3. Black Sabbath - War Pigs (7:25)
4. The Charlatans - [No One] Not Even The Rain (3:54)
Email us - [email protected]
Beat Motel Zine
Welcome to Beat Motel Zine, the comedy-infused alt-music podcast! Born from a zine from the DIY scene, we blend laughs with punk, metal, and everything offbeat. Discover the weirder side of bands, from unintentionally funny stage antics to musical mishaps. Tune in for a profane, comedic journey through alternative tunes, where every episode is a laugh. Join us as we explore music's funniest fringes with a punk rock spirit!
Can the alternative music scene and comedy mix? Of course they can; we'll prove it to you. Warning, episodes contain creative profanities in the vein of The Thick of It.
- No. of episodes: 129
- Latest episode: 2025-04-28
- Music Music Commentary
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